So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
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