You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
