it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
