I accidentally burped into my bong.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize
