you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
