Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
He? As in you personified your dick?
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