Christians are straight up FREAKS
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
My life is pants optional.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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