glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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