I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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