help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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