i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
