Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
