i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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