wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
Randomize
