she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
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