sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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