your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
