problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
You know, be my cock's hype man.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
