Soap is not a condiment
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Randomize
