I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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