it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Randomize
