why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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