I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
