i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
