i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
