is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
