ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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