I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
