Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize