I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Randomize
