What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Randomize
