someone threw a dead crab at me
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
