Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
