so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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