Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
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