still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Randomize