D3 body, D1 cock
I'm pants shitting drunk right now
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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