doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
