he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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