I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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