If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
