I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
