i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
