At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
