Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
he shaved USA in his pubs
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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