You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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