Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
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