I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
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