i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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