no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I will be naked everywhere
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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